Truths
I am scared, afraid, panic attack prone
anxiety prone, wound up, awake
I am so awake I barely blink, so awake I feel everything and nothing
Feel sad, bitter, nervous, happy, passionate, anxious
And I am am wound
I am wound so tight I feel every nerve vibrating, each neuron firing
not at the same time, but consecutively, one by one by one by one by one
Each one passing a message to the other
In a strange inner being message of chinese telephone,
Each communicating to the other on an individual level, with its own tone and vernacular
Some whispering some shouting, all distorting the message in their own way
Clouded by emotion
My message gets lost and misunderstood
The last neuron shouts out a declarative sentence
Nonsensical and irrelevant
My message is lost
And my anxiety begins once more
This is how I feel every day on the hour – trying to get out a message to have it distorted and convoluted, but powerless to translate it, too late is catching the confusion to stem the tide of miscommunication.
